Journal - Adrian Davis - Fundamentals of Acting - THR 121

9/2/2004
I don't think I've ever consistently kept a journal, so we'll see how well this works.  Today in class when we had to make a gesture while we said are name was hard.  I can't think of things on the spot like that.  I guess my inability to do so though showed a piece of my personality though.  I don't particularly like to express myself, and my hurdle for this class is going to be that I'm content with who I am, why pretend to be anyone else?  I guess I'll be learning why in this class…  REMEMBER 5 w's, monologue should have an emotional evolution in it, an actor is the creator and medium- this poses interesting challenges for the performer.

9/7/2004
my monologue-
1-900-Desperate, Christopher Durang, character- Gretchen, 30-years old
No, mother I don't have a date tonight. Yes, I know it's Saturday
night. Yes, I know my sister Rebecca is married and has children.
I've met the children. Yes, they're lovely... Well, I'm sorry my
life makes you unhappy mother, but I'm very happy here alone in my
apartment on Saturday. Oh, I don't know. Maybe I'll rent a video
tonight. Or eat an entire cake. No, I'm kidding. You know I don't
keep food in the house. I have water and baking soda, so if I get
indigestion from not eating anything, I've got it under control.

Mother, please don't say that about me, you make me feel worthless and
desperate. No, I don't want you to lie to me. No, I take that back--
I DO want you to lie to me. Tell me that it's okay that I'm alone on
a Saturday night and that I'm fine. Say that, mother. Say it.

Uh-huh...that's very good. Now the other part...uh-huh. Good. Well
thank you mother, it's very sweet of you to feel that way. Now I have
to go put my frozen dinner in the microwave, so let me hang up the
phone... Well I get radiation at the dentist too... Let's drop it.
Let me get off the phone now. Goodnight. Yes, I love you too.
(hangs up)

Oh, thank God I'm off the phone! But what should I do now? Oh, I do
feel desperate...

9/9/04
exposition, climax, resolution, emotion, motion  ß importante!-- to identify in script and emphasize in performance.  Anatoly said the use of props is good to establish things about the character that may be hard to interpret just my physicalizations.   I'm happy about this because in my comedic monologue, the character is on the phone and I was having difficulty trying to visualize in my head how to effectively mime that through the whole piece.   REMEMBER- aspects of comedy should be exaggerated, this makes it more funny.

9/14/2004
ID method- you learn about yourself by defining yourself with your character--> learning about yourself.
Talked about the "magic if" today in class.  The book describes this as treating the needs and objectives of your character as "if" they were the needs of your own.  This principle sounds great, but I have a very difficult time doing that.  I have an extremely difficult time trying to convince myself to pretend to be someone else, for what a part of my brain says is no reason.  The other half of my brain says there is a reason, it's for a class, but that side isn't very dominant I guess.

9/15/2004
I envision my monologue character sitting down talking on the phone wearing sweatpants or lounging clothes, flipping through a magazine like Cosmo.

9/16/2004
If I could be any animal, I think I specifically want to be my cat, Kitty Bitty, not only because he's spoiled, but also because he actually has an interesting personality.  I was trying in class to explain that he is a very pretty cat, you wouldn't think he was a stray if you saw him- he's all white with a black spot on his head that looks like a toupee.  But he's also not that bright, I was using the term "football player" in class, but I think it was Jenny who suggested "jock" and I think that word is a little more fitting.  "Pretty boy" also comes into mind.  Anyways, back to his personality- he can be completely crazy running around for no reason & running into things & falling off stuff and then on the flip side be very needy and affectionate.  He enjoys attention, mostly being picked up and will make sure that he's into what you're doing.   I think he would be an interesting character to portray.

The girl who did her monologue in class today (stood up on chair) did a pretty good job.  I really like how she went for that dimension of height right away, I don't think I will be ready to add things like that to my performances for awhile.   Although I'm not one to talk on this subject, she spoke really fast.  She should slow down and find places to insert pauses, so that feels like she is really passionate about what she is speaking about.

9/21/2004
We talked about Winter Shorts today in class and the importance of identifying with your character.  Maybe I should have picked a monologue that would have been a bit easier for me to identify with.  My character is being harassed by her mom about not have a date, when I myself have never really dated.  I've had one boyfriend and we're still together…

9/23/2004
"You have to see what a piece takes out of you before you can see what to put in it."

9/28/2004
Talked about objectives and obstacles today.  The book uses the term SIP meaning "single, immediate, personally important" goal.  You know, reading all this, I can't help but think is actors must really like what they do b/c there's a lot of work involved beyond memorizing lines.

Jenny's monologue from A Winter's Tale left me confused.  I don't know if it was her tone or speed, or just the text, but I had no clue what was going on.  Her objective- get out of jail, her obstacle- the king has complete control.

9/30/2004
I'm looking for my second monologue and looking for something that I can relate a more too than the previous monologue.  Joel did a monologue from the movie Hedwig and the Angry Inch today I think it fit him pretty well.  In my opinion he went a little overboard with the accent.  Some important things to remember-> break down text to "bits" of action to help shape character and part, have 3 levels in voice, physicalization, etc. and assign the space around you meanings.

10/5/2004
Text is a blueprint, actor is a builder  these lead up to performance.  Still looking for a monologue that has something I've experienced in it.  Borrowed a book of monologues and a monologue sourcebook.

10/7/2004
I found this monologue online and I think I'll try to use it- 
Ivanov by Chekhov - Anna

I am beginning to think that fate has cheated me, Doctor. There are a great many people, perhaps no better than I, who are happy without having had to pay for their happiness. But I have paid for everything, absolutely everything! ... And so dearly! Why should I have had to pay such terribly high interest? 

...My dear friend, you are always so considerate of me, so tactful, you are afraid to tell me the truth, but do you think I don't know what my illness is? I know perfectly well... 

Can you tell funny stories? Nikolai can. You say that Nikolai is this or that, one thing and another. How can you know him? Is it possible to know a man in six months? That is a remarkable man, Doctor, and I am sorry you didn't know him two or three years ago. Now he's depressed, he doesn't talk, he doesn't do anything, but then... how fascinating he was! I fell in love with him at first sight. I just looked at him and the trap was sprung! He said, "Come," and I cut myself off from everything; it was just like cutting dead leaves with a scissors, and I went... But now, it's different... Now he goes to the Lebedevs' to amuse himself with other women, and I... I sit in the garden and listen to owls screech.

10/14/2004
I marked my monologue for some physicalization aspects after talking about it in class, mainly simple stuff that I'll probably be too nervous and forget to do in class anyways.  I wish that I had time to watch TV or movies so I could try to pick up on some stuff professional actors do, but I don't have the time.  
I thought the monologue by Marie needed a bit of work.  There wasn't much feeling in it.  I think for beginning to act Shakespeare's a bit hard.   Like we've been talking about in our drama lit class, that he didn't really provide actors anything to work with like more modern playwrights do and I think the added stage directions and descriptions help learning students, at least me.